Every night Dunkin' used to leap up onto bed and choose his spot beside me. We'd fuss around until we realized our most perfect position. It was usually me spooning his body and holding his broad chest with my left hand. I expected Dunkin' to be a big brother to kids I will someday have. And now he's not here. There is a vacuum inside of my chest.
I look at us in these pictures and it blows my mind. I cannot even believe that this happened. The images and sounds of July 4th are vividly in my mind and I think..."Is Dunkin' really gone? Could the cops really have thrown caution to the wind and acted like robots that day? When will I wake up to my life again?" I am still in shock.
Dunkin' impacted my daily life and my life plans. With him gone, everything is new to me. I still picture him trotting beside me everywhere I go. I miss his presence, his spirit, his affection.
I heard that I can have Dunkin's ashes turned into a diamond. The only way I can think to commemorate Dunkin's brilliant life is by getting his remains turned into something that signifies his resplendence in my life daily. This is something that would help me feel warm when I wish he was still here... as he really SHOULD be... but fate is fate, destiny is destiny, and I am doing the best that I can. That's all I can do.