Tuesday, March 2, 2010

March

My left arm and hand buzzes. The irght hand and fingers get cold and warm with no notice. I sometimes cannot even find the time to react to the changes in my skin temperature as it happens so quickly. Sometimes is stays for a few minutes, other times, seconds, and other times, hours. I have no fear of these symptoms, I just am mindful of them.

My skin hurts on my hands. A patch of skin on my right thigh was burning last night, and all evening. It's annoying wearing pants, or anything that touches that part of my leg but what can you do? I just ignore it as much as possible.

I still cry for Dunkin. I still can't believe this is my reality. I still cannot stop feeling scared and traumatized by those inhumane men that day. I find it hard to understand time still..or maybe, I finally understand it. It feels like 5 minutes ago that Dunkin was alive, it feels like I just had his large paws in my hands or on my shoulders. 5 minutes ago he was here, 5 minutes ago people could have used cognitive thinking skills, 5 minutes ago Dunkin could have been safely removed from a vehicle as he was a service animal. 5 minutes... so far away. Never to return.